Joke jokes
What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?
One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.
I make suicidal jokes because I am a suicidal joke. And now for my closing act at the end of the rope.
These jokes are so dark that they picked the cotton!
What’s the difference between someone’s wife and a plate?
They both have to stay in the kitchen.
If you were a room in my house, I’d make you the basement.
So I could put kids inside you.
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
We should really stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad.
What's a terrorist's favorite car? A Porsche 9/11.
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
An emo girl and a squirrel both fall out of a tree. Who hits the ground first? The squirrel. The rope stops the emo girl.
That shirt's very becoming on you.
If I were on you, I’d be coming too.
What’s the worst joke ever? Your parents’ relationship.
What do you call a black person having a fit?
A chocolate milkshake.
Yo mama so poor, when I rang her doorbell, she said, "Ding!"
My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?
Did you know every market in Africa is a black market?
What’s the difference between a mountain and your girl?
At least the mountain has two hills.
What do you call a fast boat?
Usain Boat.
What did one twin say to the other?
"Watch out for the plane!"
What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?
"Can you show me what rape is?"