Joke jokes
Abortion is not a joke.
I was going to walk to Verizon, but I decided to Sprint over to T-Mobile instead.
billie: hi.
me: You wanna hear a story?
billie: Yes, sure.
me: Once upon a time, I ran over your dog last night.
Why don't people play hide-and-seek in the number 4?
Because it would take forever. Get it? "For-ever" and "4" four, so "four ever."
What do you call an octopus with a hat?
An octopus with a hat, of course.
How do you get a clown off your swing?
You shoot it.
The irony of metal jokes is pretty fun. But it leads to a lot of people stealing them.
What do you call someone with a small dick... whoever is reading this 😉
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex, sex, sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
I have a skeleTON of jokes, but none of them are very humorous.
Ur mom.
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?
A cliffhanger.
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
What did the man's dick say to the man?
I just can't "hand"le it!
Where did Sally go after the explosion?
Everywhere.
What does your mom and a slinky have in common?
They aren't much to look at, but you can't help but crack a smile when you see them tumbling down the stairs.
What is a lesbian's favorite potato chip flavor?
Porn Cocktail.
What's a pedophile's favorite type of shoe?
White Vans.