Joke jokes
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
Why do pizzas not tell jokes?
They're too cheesy.
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it's a piñata... BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
She didn't have any arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
Q: What’s the difference between me and you?
A: I’m not wasting my time reading this joke.
What's the best part about having sex with 28 year olds? There are 20 of them.
Q: What's black, white, and Asian?
A: A panda!
— Wanna hear a joke about ghosts?
— No.
— That's the spirit!
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
A panda walks into a bar. He asked the bartender for a sandwich and then proceeds to shoot him, then leaves the bar. Later on, after asking witnesses, the police track down the panda and take him to the station. They question him and ask, “Why’d you do it?” The panda replied, “It’s what pandas do, look it up.” So they did, they went on Wikipedia, and there it was: Pandas eat shoots and leaves.
Eggs
You crack me up!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, it's just a joke!
What's the difference between leafmen and leafwomen? Palm trees.
Actually, it isn't a bear joke, but bear with me here...
What did Chris Brown say when he saw Rihanna?
"I'd hit that."
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.