it's jokes
Yo hairline so far, that if you put tables on it, it would NEVER end.
If something doesn't make sense to an Eskimo... is it counterINUITive?
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
Pete: Knock, knock...
Paul: Who's there?
Pete: Boo...
Paul: Boo who?
Pete: Don't cry, it was only a joke!
Paul: I'm going to cry! It was such a bad joke!!!
I'm making a new movie, it's called "Veggie Tales." My star actor is Stephen Hawking.
What does a sponge do?
It talks to Patrick.
Person 1: "Hey, I created a new word!"
Person 2: "What is it?"
Person 1: "Plagiarism!"
What season is it when you're on a trampoline?
Spring time!
Why did the bike fall over?
It was too tired.
Hey, wanna hear a construction joke?
- Sure.
Oh sorry, I'm still working on it :-]
Why is an orphan so bad at baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
Why doesn't bread like warm weather?
It gets toasty!
Time is like a machine, it slows down when beaten.
I had the best butterfingers yesterday.
I dropped it.
The thing about animals is every time you pick one up, you have to put it down.
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
What did the lampost say to the other lampost?
Nothing, because it can't speak.
You know what a big ass is. If I told you it's a fake ass, so I'm lesbo.
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.