it's jokes
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁
On this website, I just searched up "My jokes". In response, it said, "No jokes found." Wth.
Why did the painting go to jail? Because it was framed!
Why is life like penises?
Women make it hard.
Neona (😞): Are you mad at me?
Gwen (😌): Me? NEVER! Sometimes we listen and don't listen, let's just hug it out!
Neona (😁): Agreed!
Life is like a box of chocolates. It gets finished pretty quickly if you're a fat guy.
Gwen, let's chat at night for about 1 hour! I want to get to know each other better!
P.S., it's Jake.
What do you do when you finish a magazine in school?
Answer: You shoot it!
Me: Yo wanna play 9/11?
My Friend: What’s that?
Me: It’s a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
Do you want to hear a building joke?
I am still working on it.
I don’t call it special ED, I call it mixed vegetables.
I would say a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't land well.
Why is the letter "B" very cool? Because it's sitting in the AC.
Wanna hear a joke?
Yeah.
...
What's the joke?
I said it already!
Engineer: I know engineering, and my gut instinct tells me to fix it!
Biologist: I know biology, and your gut instinct is full of shit.
"Don't sneeze!"
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends, I would always tell them, "Don't sneeze!" and when I did, they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed, we laughed even harder.
Also,
"It dangles and swung!"
Language art quizzes are the best.
Me: I finished a book with 100 pages.
Someone else: How was it?
Me: It's a long story.
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart.
I made sure it didn't outsmart me.