it's jokes
Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening.
Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs.
Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water.
But after jumping in the ocean, it's 100%, just like my depression.
When I was younger, I went to an Indian convenience store to pick up a lottery ticket. When the cashier handed me the ticket, she told me to "hold it properly." So I ripped the red dot right off of her forehead.
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
Why can't an orphan get married? It doesn't have its parents' blessing.
Why is life like penises?
Women make it hard.
Are you interested in it?
More than two boot branches.
Why can Elsa hold a balloon? She will "Let It Go"!
The Cheerio Joke
Let's say you're in high school, and your popularity level was based on what Cheerio you are. So there's Extra-Frosty Cheerios as the most popular kids, the frosted Cheerios were the popular kids, the Regular Cheerios as the typical normal kid, then there's the honey nut Cheerios as the nerds and geeks, and then there's your Cheerio which is the Chocolate Cheerios. Now you want to ask this girl who's an extra frosty, you go up to her and ask her to Homecoming, but she declines.
So after school gets out, you go home and rewind. The next day you wake up feeling like a honey nut Cheerio, so you go up to her again and ask her again, she still says no. So you go home and rewind again and wake up the next morning feeling like a Regular Cheerio. So you go to school and ask her again, she still declines. So you go home and rewind again. The next morning, you wake up feeling like a frosty Cheerio. So you go up to her and ask again, still says no. Then you go home and unwind. The next day you wake up feeling like an extra frosty Cheerio. Feeling doubtful, you go up to her one last time and ask her. She finally says yes.
The next day is Homecoming, and you and your date are on the dance floor, and she wants punch. So she tells you that she's going to go get punch. She goes and gets punch and is back in 30 seconds. You ask her why it was so fast. She replies with; "Oh there wasn't a punch line."
You know I would make a deaf joke, but I don't think they would hear it.
Your hairline is so long it reaches your toes.
Everyone: So, wait, let me get this straight. Feminists want to cancel Father's Day because it is offensive to single mothers.
Feminists: Correct.
Everyone: Then what the f*** is the point of Mother's Day?
How many dead slaves does it take to change a lightbulb?
Apparently, more than 6, because my basement is still dark.
I would tell you the pun about the broken pencil, but it has no point to it.
Did you hear about the new Oasis restaurant?
Every time you order soup, you got a roll with it.
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.
Once I heard a joke about chocolate. It wasn't that funny, so I just Snickered.
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.
Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?
Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.