it's jokes

If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???

A kid gets home from school and finds his mom and dad having sex. The kid asks, "What are you doing, Dad?" The dad replies, "Having sex with your mom, son," and he starts laughing.

The next day, Dad gets home from work and finds his son having sex with his nan. The dad shouts, "What the hell are you doing, son?" The kid replies, "It's not funny when it's your mom, is it?"

Why does Royal Cola have more royalty than a queen?

Answer: It tastes better.

On April 1st, there was a baby born in the hospital when the doctor, out of sudden, directly takes the baby from the mother and smashes as hard as he can to the wall.

The mother crying and yelling, "What did you do? You killed my Baby!! Why did you kill my Baby?"

The doctor just laughs and says, "April, April, it was already dead."

Hahaha

There was a cowboy riding in a desert when he saw a little girl up ahead. He heard her crying, so he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her: "Hey, what's going on? Why do you cry? Where are your parents? What happened?"

The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The Indians came, killed my father and my mother, and raped my sister."

The cowboy just laughed, unlocked his belt, and pulled his trousers down and said, "Guess it isn't your day, is it?"

When I was acting up, my mother used to tell me, "I brought you into this world, and I will take you out. I gave you life, and I can also take it." So my son was acting up and talking back to me. Now I'm being charged with murder. I don't understand. I thought it was okay to kill your own kids.

So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now I’m in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe he’s a hero after he killed Hitler.

You know what's the worst about having a daughter with cancer?

You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back.

See, morbid humor is just like water, not everyone gets it.

Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself? I would too if all I heard was "daaaaaaah!"

When I am getting bored, I hold a banana and start shaking it suddenly. It gives out juice after a few minutes. I get excited. Ohhhhhh!

Try with a cucumber.

What does a car have when it's very itchy?

A road rash.

Me say, "Crack my finger."

My hubby crack my finger.

Now say it backwards.

Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.

Sister: No, I won't stop.

Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.

Sister: What? You will see when I post it.

Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?

Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.

Is your oven running?

Then you better go catch it!

Is your tap water running well?

Beta, go catch it!

Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.

What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?

Kentucky Fried Children!

What's it called when you eat those same babies?

Finger Lickin' Good!

When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."

All these jokes are so offensive, Mr. Hawking just won’t stand for it.