IT jokes

My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.

The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"

Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"

Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.

Why did the AI go to school?

To upgrade from "Artificially Intelligent" to "Artificially Hilarious"!

Ha ha ha. It is so funny. I hope you enjoy, fellow humans.

Why is it so punny when Sans tells a joke in the evening?

Because a SANSET is happening.

Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.

Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sourpuss.

I wanted to take a bath, but decided to leave it where it is.

Yo mama's so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.

What stresses a baby strawberry out?

When its mom is in a jam.

Do they call it rapeseed oil because it is lube?

Is it just me, or do these gays need to leave me alone?

We are coming out with a Whopper that is similar to a priest because it also has its meat between 5-year-old buns.

I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.

My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.

One day, I was just chillin', being a tower. I saw a plane, but it was slowly growing.

Then it hit me.

Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?

Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!

What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?

Panera Sed!

Your hairline is so messed up, it made Jeffrey Dahmer cry.

Your hairline is so far back my grandpa said he had a glimpse of it in the 1960s.

Did you guys know that Chancellor Palpatine is suing Nike?

Apparently, the company stole his slogan: Just "Do It."