Did I tell you I finally got my wife to scream during sex? Yeah, you should have heard her the other day when I walked in on her.
Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.
I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great, either.
Her: Eat my ass!
Me: Yes, chef!
Meeting a girl at a park is good, but parking meat in girl is better.
Who ever said "condom?" YES DADDY!
Ty choked on DT’s willy.
Prince, are you really gay, because I love you with all my heart and pray for you all the time!
PLEASE CHOOSE ME INSTEAD! :(
I just had sex.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My I.
May I who?
May I put this pussy on your mouth?
I’m horny who else is *ugh ugh papi harder*.
This one butt cheek said to the other one, "It's really personal, but it's okay, I'll tell you." It said, "Hey, let's go to my crib so we can smoke a little joint, watch a movie, and go upstairs in the room and get down."
Q: Sex is great, only your mate can sometimes be a little nuts!
(I am still a single young virgin.)
Why do men lick girls' boobs in sex?
'Cause they are just boys.
What happened when you put your penis in? You start cumming!
Tyler: What's your favorite fruit?
Frankie: Pineapple duh, what's yours?
Tyler: Pineapple
Frankie: Wanna come over and watch some Netflix? I'm home alone.
Tyler: Absolutely!! What time should I be there?
Frankie: Right now.
Tyler: Sweet! Should I bring a condom?
Frankie: Now enough talk, let's fuck.
Tyler: I thought you never asked.
My girlfriend asked for a kiss, so I gave her my dick.
Want to have sex?
I think I need to kiss your butt.
