1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon. 3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.” 4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop. 5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river. 6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils. 7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope. 8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves. 9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match. 10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee. 11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”). 12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted. 13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. 14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat. 15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball. 16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing. 17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
I was bullying stephen hawkings, I told him why not stand up for yourself.
You say to your slow friend: Damn your slower than Stephen Hawkings. And that takes some talent.
I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat Vehicles and Tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.
Your forehead so big your thoughts started on a monday and didn't end til' sunday
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to stop the Cold War with a heater.
no one is smart i am smart
If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb to the top of your ego then jump to your IQ.
I went to school with a gay guy who was really smart, but he always got mad that he got straight A's instead of getting all the D's
What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?
I don't know! I don't care!
When the C.I.A. raided Osama Bin Laden’s house, they found steam on his computer this means he was a gamer. He raged a little too hard and went for New York.
what do you call a group of special ed kids with guns............... special forces
Hey JFK, what would you do if you were in a fight?
JFK: Well, I'd give them a piece of my mind.
Why are Americans so dumb?
Because they shoot the ones that go to school.
Okay, Good night everyone who has common sense! "Akeld" you did not make it.
A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"
Some say Stephen Hawkins was a genius but I never heard him say anything intelligent.
CAN WE PLEASE STOP THE FRICKING DRAMA! I see people bullying other people too, Gwen is not the only one. For god sake just do jokes, if you want to bully some one do it in your family! You people don't even know each other but were still doing this stupid NONSENSE! JUST MAKE JOKES PEOPLE! That is why it's called "Worst JOKES ever" not "Bully people EVER" SO SHUT UP AND GET A LIFE DUM DUMS! Geez! The only reason why I come here is to spread jokes and kindness like Gwen and others, not to spread HATE AND FOOLISHNESS FROM PEOPLE WHO DON'T EVEN KNOW BETTER THINGS TO DO BUT TO HATE ON STUPID STRANGERS FROM DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE FRICKING WORLD!!!! "Addison shut up your only 8 years old. What do you know.?" I might be 8 but at least I got some sense, and plus I'm way smarter than you guys anyway. I'm in alert. You know like a very, very, very, intelligent kid! That can spell instead of saying "u" I say the true say you instead of "pls" it's "please." Sorry if I did meant it...which I don't!
Your forehead is so big, Mastermind got jealous.
