Leo: Mother, what is an idiot?
Mother: An idiot is someone that explains something in a long, boring way so that the person that the idiot is trying to explain to doesn't understand.
Mother: Do you understand?
Leo: No.
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.
Do you know your E?
You're E tarded.
What do you call a person who's got their wisdom tooth removed too late?
Dumb.
Why shouldn’t you pick on a midget with learning difficulties?
... Because it’s not big and it’s not clever.
Why are dolphins so smart?
Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!
Yo momma so stupid, she pooped in the shower.
Yo mama so dumb, she tried to put m&m's in alphabetical order.
Question: What's the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain.
One day a computer said to another computer, "Why are you so dumb?"
The other computer replied, "Because I have low memory."
A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”
What is a kid who loves school?
A smart kid.
What is a dog that is awesome? A smart dog.
Retards.
He’s not dead, just his storage unit.
Why are baby elephants so smart? They hang out with friends!
Say "beans" fast three times.
Now you’re an idiot.
How is Stephen Hawking so smart? He uploads it to his software.
My friend: Yo stupid.
Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?
My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*
Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.
