Insult jokes

My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

Lick my BALLS!

You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.

What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

What's the difference between you and an egg?

An egg gets laid.

Your hairline is so long The Rock complimented it!

The Earth was flat once. 'Til yo mama got buried.

Yo mama so fat that when she went into a crowd wearing a blue shirt, everyone yelled, "Tsunami!"

When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.

I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.

Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"

Your hairline is so far back that your forehead looks like a growing parasite!

I'm 50% human, so that 50% stupid is 100% you.

You learn from mistakes!

That's why you're an only child!

F*ck you.

Your nan.

I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!

You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.

You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.

You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.

You really put the R in special.

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Your mum's so fat, she broke Britain too!