Insult jokes

Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.

Fuck u!

"Where are you? I need to throw you out because Mum said to take out the trash."

Roberto: Judd, your DNA looks like the infinite symbol.

Judd: Roberto, your DNA looks like a pasta noodle.

Your mom is a joke.

When somebody says they're depressed (by over-romanticizing their so-called problems) but can't be by your side when you are at your lowest.

Then you know they're faking depression. 🙂

If you know it, you know it.

"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."

What is a chode?

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your mom gay, And so are you.

Your momma is so hairy that when you were born, you got rug burn.

Your hairline goes back to when your dad left you.

When someone calls you gay, say:

"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"

Friend: You're adopted.

Orphan: At least I was chosen!

Friend: At least I was kept.

Kid: Are you gay?

Me: No, I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on.

I'd insult BlessedBrian, but it seems NATURE beat me to it.

Yo mama is so ugly, Bob the Builder said, "I can't fix you!"

Ask someone to call you a bitch. When they do, tell them, "Bitches do as they are told!"

Fuck all y'all hoes!

Your adopted.

Your momma so slutty, she masturbates with the Calgary Tower.