INS jokes
An emo kid in a leaf falls from a tree. Who falls first? Delete the rope, stop the emo.
I saw a little kid crying because he was lost. I asked him, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working in an orphanage!
"I’m going through a lot of things right now," I said frustratedly to the person on the line as I crashed straight through the next building in my car.
Did you know Stephen Hawking died in a game? The game was Happy Wheels.
Waiter says, "Sir, we ran out of ranch, so I had the boys in the back improvise. But don't worry... It has even more zip & twang to it!"
What do you call Anne born in May? A Maybe.
How do you get ten babies in a bucket?
With a blender.
Me: Hi Kallen.
Kallen: Hi.
Me: You're too big to fit in my car.
When you’re having the best sex in your life and your grandma says, “I’m not dead!”
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
How much do the bones in your body weigh?
A skele-ton!
My wife and I have been married over 30 years, but don’t get me wrong, we still perform tricks in the bedroom.
I sit up and beg, she rolls over and plays dead.
At night, before I got in bed with my girl, I had 206 bones, but I developed a 207th bone.
Q: Why don’t orphans have a personality?
A: They don’t have a person in reality!
My bestie: Are you dirty-minded?
Me: Do I have dirt in my mind? No.
Why is a giraffe's neck so long?
Because his head is so high up in the air.
Heard about the new event in Africa? Called the Hunger Games.
Yo momma so fat when she went in the Skeld, she couldn't be ejected.
What do women and dog turds have in common?
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Your mama so fat she got in to the pool, the water got out and big mama! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH