INS jokes
Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning? because they don't have balls to scratch.
What do kids have in comments? They have parents, right?
A guy starts texting a cute girl and asks her to give him her phone number so he can call her. The girl says, "OK, but you have to transfer mobile balance to my number. Then I am gonna be your girlfriend and will meet you somewhere." He transfers her the balance and calls her, but it turns out the girl was actually a guy making him a fool. He blocked him.
The next day, he was very angry about himself being a fool, so he thought he'd do the same. He makes a fake girl account and starts texting with some random guy, and then he asks that guy to send him balance. Suddenly, his father came into his bedroom and asked, "Son, can you send me some balance? I am gonna send you cash after sometime." That guy looks at his father with suspicious eyes, and then he calls that random number. Suddenly his father's phone starts ringing......
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
What’s pink, rusty, and covered in cobwebs?
Madeline McCann's bike.
Why is America the fastest readers?
They went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
How do you fit 100 rape victims inside a Mini Cooper?
In the ashtray.
I can't come in, because I'm too high.
Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park in his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.
Neona (😟): I bet you I'm not going to get that job at all!
Gwen (😌): Yeah well, I believe in you.
Neona (😔): You got the job, and am I still waiting for them to call me and remind me that I will, but I won't get it. Anyway, I need to prepare for a job that I won't get.
Gwen (😠): Neona, you just don't got enough confidence. You got to have confidence in life. I know you will get the job. I do now. Just believe instead of giving up!
Neona (😞): UGH fine!!!
Gwen (😉): I'll see you at that job interview!!!! Put a smile on your face, too!
Neona (😊): Okay...Gwen, you're the best!
There's a Mexican, Brazilian, and Cuban in a S60. Who's driving?
How do you organize a rave party in Ethiopia? Just put some bread on the ceiling.
What happens to teeth when they go in water?
Bro, I dunno, they get wet?
I watched the series of "Unfortunate Events" 4 times, all the shows 4 times. I am crying. I am trying to finish the rest, then my brother comes in and says it is PG (Parental Guidance). After that, my brother called me a baby, then he pushed me off my bed. 😭
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
I'm in jail for 5 minutes and I already got fucked 15 times. You don't have any idea how much I hate playing Monopoly with my dad.
How do you start a rave in Ethiopia?
You put food on the ceiling and they start jumping.
How many letters are there in the alphabet? 26? No, 8!
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
What do you call a priest that graduated from law school?
Father-in-law.