INS jokes

Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?

Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.

What do you say to a depressed person on the ceiling?

Hang in there!

So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

There once was a brother and a sister. So, one night, it's storming really bad and the sister goes into the brother's room and asks, "Can I stay with you tonight because I'm scared?" The brother replies with, "Yeah, sure, but just don't tell Mom." So the girl climbs into the bed and looks under the sheets to see the boy's penis and asks, "What's that?" And the boy replies with, "That's my pet snake." And the girl asks, "Can I pet it?" And the boy says, "Sure, just don't tell Mom." And the boy falls asleep and wakes up in a hospital and asks, "What happened?" And the girl said, "I pet the snake but it spit on me so I bit its head off."

What do Americans and Rubik's Cubes have in common?

They both have a history of separating colors.

I was in a public bathroom in a handicap stall, and when I got out, a handicapped man told me that I was an a**hole. I told him, "Bet you won't stand up and say that to my face," and then he broke down.

I was going to charge my phone, so I pulled a plug and put it in. Then, my grandpa wasn't breathing anymore.

Yo mama so ugly, when she looks in a mirror, it says, "Viewer discretion advised!"

A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.

-- Jeffery Dahmer

What do you call a roach in milk?

A roach con leche. 😂

What starts with T, ends with T, and has T in it?

A teapot.

In Israel, they chop convicted rapists' balls off. Sure glad I don't live in Israel.

What do humans and monkeys have in common? They both hang from trees.

My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.

What do the twin towers and genders have in common? There used to be two, now they're a sensitive topic.

what do you call 6 gay men in WWII?

Rainbow Six Siege.

If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"

Bully 1 to Bully 2: You're ugly.

Bully 2: Look in a mirror.

Bully 1: Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will work for everyone else.

What do you call a skeleton who went out in the snow? A numb skull!

Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.