INS jokes
What does my dad have in common with Nemo?
They both can’t be found.
What do gay guys and priests have in common?
They are both gay in their own ways.
I got my daughter a trampoline for her birthday. The ungrateful bitch just sat there in her wheelchair and cried.
People in wheelchairs need to stand up for themselves.
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
YouTubers: Among Us in real life.
Bin Laden: Angry Birds in real life.
How did Hitler tie his shoes?
He tied them in little Nazis.
I called a suicide hotline in Iraq... They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
I got caught peeing in the pool.
The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!
People said that we needed to follow in Kobe's footsteps, but there are none.
Why was the emo kicked out of the circus?
Because he was cutting in line!
My brother told me he wanted to find a golden apple tree in real life. I told him it was a fruitless mission.
Why was the giraffe late to work?
Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.
Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?
Because their parents were in a jam.
What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.
There were 3 guys in detention called Zip, Willy, and Pee, and they were all being naughty. The teacher came in and said, "Zip down, Willy out, Pee in the corner."
I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants, and it was driving me nuts.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair? A RC-XD.
Why did the orphan wait in line?
To see their parents next.