INS jokes
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
What's in a man's mouth when he realizes he's gay?
A dick.
One day I threw a boomerang...
Now I live in constant fear.
She said you can twerk, so I put her in a tractor and put her to work. She got mad at me and said, "There's no good men," but I gave her a kob and equal pay!
What is one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in the school zone.
My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.
I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"
There's a blind hooker in town.
She never sees anyone coming.
When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.
Did you know Hellen Keller had a doll house in her backyard? Neither did she.
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
Elmo in 2022 is called "Tickle My Balls Elmo."
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?
Me: No.
Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.
What do you call a friend in space?
Space friend.
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
The people in 9/11 were the fastest readers. They went through 10 stories in 10 seconds.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
nsjajahdahwggwdgdvtwqfdvgcqgvhheydgdygsydgdfydwfwdgsqgsgyd
What does a zebra and I have in common?
We both have stripes.