INS jokes
What are the best shooting ranges in America?
Schools.
There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."
Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
You realize you're in a paradox until you die. You'll see yourself die by murder, suicide, old age, etc.
Then you realize you're dreaming, but you realize that if you die in a dream, you die IRL.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.
Do you know how babies are made? The boy puts his penis in the girl's butt and goes up and down for ten minutes. Then the girl takes a pregnancy test, and if it says no, then you keep doing it until she is pregnant.
The boy will lick the girl down there, and she will put his penis in her mouth and suck it. Then he will spit on his hand and rub it on her boobs and lick/suck them.
My grandma always told my dad if a bird ever got in your house/truck, someone would die later that exact day.
She found out she had cancer. 11 months later, my grandpa died of a stroke. I hope to see them in heaven. I’d like to meet them. Pls comment good things. I really, really love them, even though I didn’t get to meet them. 😭😭😭
The "f" in "orphan" stands for "amily." There is no "f."
Why do men lick girls' boobs in sex?
'Cause they are just boys.
What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?
Nut in the butt.
What do you call Greg in your class? Obese.
What starts with "M" and ends in "arrige" and is a man's favorite thing?
Miscarriage, this joke never gets old, just like the baby.
Your forehead is so big that you dream in 4K.
Girls are like numbers squared. If they're under 13, just do 'em in your head.
What do you say to a kid in a trash compactor?
You looking a little square.
Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family because there is no "f" in orphan.
A man was walking with a young boy in the woods.
The boy looks at the man and says, "Mister, it's too dark and I'm getting scared."
The man replies with, "How do you think I feel? I have to come back alone!"
This is a bad one but why do orphans hate their life even more in 2021?
Cause kids just laugh at them...
What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?
"Put it in my bill."