INS jokes
Your hairline is so bad, it goes back in time!
Buy KFC = 1 dead orphan in your house.
Buy KFC = 1 more orphan in our fryers.
Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.
1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"
How do you get a baby in a box? With a blender.
What’s the difference between orphans and cars?
I don’t have 1080 cars in my basement.
A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
What do you call 2 nudists in Africa?
Naked and Afraid.
"If two sides in a battlefield read my book, there will be no winner."
Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
1 like = 1 more child in my fryer.
Why does the wind always blow from the "West" in Washington State?
Answer: Because IDAHO SUCKS!
What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.
I was playing hide and seek at work the other day. Unfortunately, it ended with me in the hospital, though; ICU.
Do you like In-N-Out?
Yes, why? In and out of your mouth.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 comment = 1 kid in my microwave.
+1 share = 1 kid in my blender.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
And God said to John, "Come forth, and you shall be granted eternal life."
But John came fifth and won a toaster.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.