If jokes

If you play games, go play on your sister.

What do you call an autistic kid if he was short?

A short tistic.

Your favorite music artist is Cardi B? I prefer Cardi A+ if I'm being honest.

I saw a kid sitting on the side and asked if he was an orphan, “what gave me away?” “Well, your parents, for a start.”

So, I was laying in bed and it's winter, so my room is always cold because the heater doesn't work.

And I was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then I laughed because who would wanna be with me. Hahaha

If LEO were a spice, she’d be flour... BLAND and FORGETTABLE!

If she’s old enough to smoke, She’s old enough to choke.

If she’s old enough to pee, She’s old enough for me.

If BLESSEDBRIAN were any more inbred, he’d be a SANDWICH.

My girlfriend is so stupid, she asked me if I wanted to shower with her to save money on our water bill, while we were staying at a hotel where we didn't even have to pay the water bill.

The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!

If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?

If you were to drop an emo and a leaf off a tree, who would hit the ground first?

The leaf, because the emo is always hanging.

If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?

If you enter the bathroom as an American and leave the bathroom as an American, what are you in the bathroom?

A European.

If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents!

You can't lose Kahoot if you "kashoot" the class first.

If BlessedBrian were ANY LESS intelligent, he’d have to be WATERED twice a week.

If there is a guy in a wheelchair and he is a bully, say, "I’m still standing."

Like if you are a simp.

So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.

And I asked him what he is doing.

Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.

Me: Erm... Are you a simp?

Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.

KG: You have it?

Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?

KG: Sure!

KG then went to her room.

Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-

KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.

KG: Have fun playing with them!

Guy: WHAT THE FU-