If jokes
So, if she gargles your cum, is that a jacuzzi daycare?
Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom, and they bought pads.
The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no, and her mom fainted!
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.
It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
Memes
If my boobies are fish, then am I salmon boobies? Please give generously.
What's a chair's favorite snack?
Chair-ies or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
If the red house is on the left, and the blue house on the right, where is the white house?
In Washington D.C.
If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.
If you're bored, punch an orphan, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
(To a thief) If you like taking things, how about you take my life?
Roses are red, violets are blue, If I slapped you, that’d be animal abuse.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.
Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?
In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣
Warning: if you don't like gummy bears, DO NOT READ.
Q: What do you call a Mexican gummy bear?
A: Delici-Oso
If you're a simp, just remember, it means "Suckers Idolizing Mediocre Pussy."