If jokes

Rain

  • It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.

  • 9
  • Difference

  • What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?

    If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.

    Difference

  • What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?

    If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.

  • 1
  • Difference

  • What is the difference between a lesbian and a female prostitute?

    If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.

  • 2
  • Feminazi

  • What is the difference between a feminazi and a female prostitute?

    If you want the female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.

    Lesbian

  • If two feminazis are carpet munchers, which one in the lesbian relationship cooks?

    They both don't because both of the carpet munchers are too busy eating each other's pussy 😋 🤪 😌 😏 😜 👍 👍 👌 👌 👏 🏆 🥇 💭 🤔 😮 😁 😊 😃 😄 👌 😍 🥰 ☺️

  • 1
  • Stalin

  • Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.

    Hitler says, “Yes.”

    Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”

    Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”

  • 1
  • Cousin

  • Four men were asked if they could have something with their cousin for €500.

    The first replied: "For 500€? Of course!"

    The second said: "I'd do it for free!"

    The third replied: "I would even give her 200€!"

    The fourth replied: "With my ex? Never!"

  • 1
  • Children

  • My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.

    If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

  • 1
  • Rape

  • My wife said if I rape her again, she would leave me. Why didn't anyone tell me it was that easy?

  • 1
  • Mom

  • One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.

    A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.

  • 4
  • Test

  • Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?

    Son: Ok dad.

    AFTER TEST

    Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?

    Son: Son?