Hygiene Jokes

Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it was stuck in a crack.

Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?

He was stuck in the crack.

Don’t fart in an Apple Store.

It has no Windows.

You’re so fat that when you sit on the toilet, it says, “A B C D E F G, get your butt off of me!”

Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.

my friend tbh

A person in a white shirt and a blue scarf waving their wet hands around to dry them, with the text: "When you need to dry your hands and there aren't any towels left."

"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"

What comes after 69?

Mouthwash.

Have you ever heard of the Russian politician who was so afraid of the dark that, instead of going to the bathroom at night, he would use a metal tin that he kept underneath his bed?

His name is Vladimir Pootin.

You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.

You're so skinny, you use chapstick as deodorant.

What vibrates and is 6 inches?

A toothbrush.

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?

He wiped his ass.

What do you call the inside of the ISS toilet?

Cosmic Brownies.

What time do babies get dirty?

Playtime.

Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.