Hygiene jokes
My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.
At least if you're fat you don't need to put as much bathwater in the bath.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
What is the sweat between Dolly Parton's boobs?
Mountain Dew.
What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?
A blood bath.
Oh, Mom, there is poop in the toilet still.
Mom: Oh, that was me and the dog.
Me: Wait, what????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Did you know toilets, while you're at work, eat your toilet paper?
Why did the toilet paper not make it across the road?
Because it got stuck in the crack.
Ur mum smells like shit, yeah, so she sucks a man off and washing machine. Yo, don’t at me, yeah, you chicken breath.
Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.
If you leave your small children inside a shower with Kelly Clarkson, you're a filthy parent.
Have you ever tried anal bleaching?
It really helps assholes lighten up.
What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!
When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...
Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
Your computer just went in my bathroom and took a shit because you put too much chili in the bowl.
Q: What do you call a nun in a pool? A: A bath bomb.
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his ass.
Everyone is talking about Head and Shoulders, and that if he never had a shower, his batteries would have got wet.
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!