Chewing Gum jokes
What do cannibals eat to freshen their breath?
Men toes.
So my sister was eating Now&Laters, and I continuously heard smacking sounds. So I told her, "Can you stop smacking? It's annoying." Then she said, "I can't, it's a juicy type of candy." So I said, "I can stop the candies from making that sound." Then she said, "How?" So I smacked her. :)
What do guns and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
How do you get chewing gum out of your hair?
Cancer.
A friend of mine chews gum, lays back to yawn, then chokes on the gum. Then I said, "God, what, you choking on dick?"
Q. What’s white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
What's the cool thing about bringing a pack of gum or a shotgun to school?
When you pull one out everybody wants to be your friend. :)
What do you call a train with bubble gum?
A chew chew train.
Oh man, I'm depressed.
What goes in dry and comes out wet and has white stuff at the end?
What's the best way to get gum out of your hair?
Cancer.