Hows jokes
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.
How do you cut your grass without a lawnmower?
You dye it blue and it will cut itself.
How do you ground a person in a wheelchair?
Take off the wheels!
How do you anger a democrat?
Don't tell him the truth.
Memes
How i feel when...
How to not exist: Kys.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
How do Asian parents name their baby?
They drop a pot down a flight of stairs.
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor?
Telephone? No.
Television? No.
How then? Tell a woman!
How do you know if an Asian is a failure?
Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said, "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
How do you find someone's hairline? It's simple, you don't.
Me: Knock knock. Bestie: Who's there? Me: Ben. Bestie: Ben Dover? Me: No, Ben vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx. Bestie: Omg how did I forget, hi vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx!
Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?
If you jump off a building and yell "parkour," how can they tell that it was intentional? T'was a failed stunt.
My mom gives me your stuff because you have bad grades.
Me: How about my 5 little brothers? I have A's; he has F's.
She lets him play anyway and I don't.
Why did Bruce Jenner cross the road?
To see how the other side felt!
How can you tell if someone Amish is an alcoholic? They keep falling off the wagon.
How do you stop an argument between two deaf people? Switch off the lights.
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.