Hows jokes
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
What is the fastest way to spread a rumor?
Telephone? No.
Television? No.
How then? Tell a woman!
How do you find someone's hairline? It's simple, you don't.
Teacher: How much is a gram?
Tyronne: Uhmm, depends on what you need.
I went to see my doctor today and I asked him how come every time I have sex my eyes hurt.
He said that’s a common reaction to pepper spray.
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
How do you stop an argument between two deaf people? Switch off the lights.
How do you see the difference between a cow and a bull? It’s either one or the udder.
How do you cut your grass without a lawnmower?
You dye it blue and it will cut itself.
How to make white ice cream red... blend a baby into it!
How do you kill Hellen Keller?
Take her on a walk off a cliff.
I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.
I'm about to tell a dwarf joke, see how short that was.
How do you know when you're disliked?
When they always give you the camera for group photos.
How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
How does cheese rat cheese?
It cheeses.