Hows

Hows jokes

Knife

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knife." "Knife, who?" "How are you still alive? I just stabbed you!"

Camera

How do you know when you're disliked?

When they always give you the camera for group photos.

Orphan

How do you make an orphan cry? Ask to go over to his house if his parents are OK with it.

Earth

Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?

Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.

Twin Towers

Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?

Friend: What?

Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.

Tree

How does a tree access the internet?

By logging in and branching out!

Grass

How do you cut your grass without a lawnmower?

You dye it blue and it will cut itself.

Emo kid

I asked the emo kid how it was hanging. He didn't reply because the rope was too tight.

Cow

How do you see the difference between a cow and a bull? It’s either one or the udder.

Santa

You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"

How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?