Hows jokes
How do you know someone has Down syndrome?
They're doing better than you.
How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
“You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
Do you know how to make 4 Albanians stand on a shoebox?
Just tell them that it floats.
When Ant-Man is the size of an atom, how can he breathe?
Memes
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dad's corpse holding a jug of milk.
Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.
How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
Hold its nose.
Worst joke ever.
My friend put an action toy and called it Kobe and put it on a drone. I realized that my friend didn't know how to fly a drone.
How do you make a lesbian upset?
Give her a multiplication test.
How are gay people like mice?
They both hate pussies.
How did the British lose the War of 1812?
They were out-Britshed.
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?
How do you bury a prostitute?
In a Y-shaped coffin.
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
When I die I want to have a piece of paper near me giving a clue on how I died, like, "I want everyone to miss me except for this bullet," or, "You didn't hang with me but guess what did?"
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
How do you take care of all the babies you just crushed with your car?
Open a pizza shop 🍕
How to commit arson:
1. Burn down an orphanage.
READ THIS OUT LOUD:
This is this cat.
This is cat.
This is how cat.
This is to cat.
This is keep cat.
This is an cat.
This is idiot cat.
This is a busy cat.
This is for cat.
This is forty cat.
this is seconds cat.
NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.