dark humor never gets old, just like children with cancer
The black nurse tells me she has been a vegan for 29 years. The father sitting next to me asks "so you don't miss fried chicken."
I have cancer the doctor said I have 3 days to live but I was like fuck it and killed him the jury said I have life in prison I shouted yes he said thank you you saved my life
my grandma unplugged the internet cable so i unplugged her life support
did you know? about 9 months after a power outage 50% more babies are born because it is dark
A man got in a bad car accident. He was at risk of losing his arm. The doctors had to perform complicated surgery on his arm. The man's wife visited after the surgery. The doctor came up to her and said: "I have good news and bad news." The wife said: "What's the good news? "We managed to save his arm." "What's the bad news?" "We couldn't save the rest of him."
Man Goes To The Doctor He Has A Banana sticking out of one ear , a carrot stinking out of the other ear and a green been stinking out of one nostrils. "Doctor, I'm not feeling well" the man complains. " Well, it's no wonder" The Doctor replies " You're not eating right"
A man went to a library and asked the librarian if they had any books on suicide.
She replied "Oh fuck off, you wont bring it back!"
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
"Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital."
"Aaron, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."
whats juice wrlds favourite salad? a seizure salad
How do you tell a child they have cancer?
With a smile on your face.
There is a man in the hospital the power went out and the man was stabbed to death, there are three witnesses, the nurse who was with another patient, the doctor who was reading some paperwork, and The Who was at the vending machine, who killed the man? The mom did because you can’t use a vending machine when the powers out!
roses are red, I'm not a boaster. Elon must got rushed to hospital after impregnating toaster.
Why can't people in africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach
When Michael Jackson was taken to the hospital, immediately the materinity ward was put on lockdown
DARK ALERT******** a girl went 2 the doctor the doctor said she had 1yr to live she shot the doctor and the judge gave her 15 yrs. DARK ALERT********
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
My stepdad took me to work and he told me I could climb trees. I woke up in a hospital, wait did I mention that my stepdad was a lumberjack
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called - sheesh
