History jokes

I screamed "Jenga" today when watching the 9/11 documentary.

Joke: Genders are much like the twin towers. They used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.

"Whole November month, sniper lessons available in Dallas U.S.?"

McDonald's was originally called "Mac and Dick," so, if you think about it, you could be enjoying a Big Dick instead of a Big Mac.

In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.

One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”

There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"

The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."

The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”

What is Beethoven doing right now?

Nothing, because he is dead.

Hippity Hoppity, women are my property.

Bippity Boppity, get the f*ck off my property!

Tonight, on Top Gear!

James May dives a bus full of kids off a mountain!

Richard Hammond starts WW3 in Germany!

And I fly a plane into the World Trade Center!

Why did the Indian cross the road?

To run away from the Pakistani.

Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.

They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.

What is George Floyd’s best pick up line?

"You're breathtaking."

In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!

What is the difference between Kanye and Hitler?

Hitler knew when his career was over.

Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.

Not to mention and by plane.

What did the captured Germans say to the French in WW1?

"Verdun for."

What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?

The HIV test results.

Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?

Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.

Why was Helen Keller slurring her fingers?

She was drunk.