What was Hellen Keller's dog's name?
Durrrrrrrr.
Q: Name a murderer?
A: Jews: Hitler. Russians: Stalin. Chinese: Mao. Americans: Bin Laden. Aborted fetus: My mom.
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
Why didn’t Anne Frank just finish her diary?
Concentration problems.
How do you know that Americans hate exercise?
9/11. How else do you explain hundreds of them jumping to their death rather than taking the stairs?
My grandpa was a great pilot, but he died on September 11, 2001.
People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!
Iceberg: Hold my beer.
Name one person who would take an orphan?
Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
Do you know who invented paper?
Cai Lun!
“RIP” Cai Lun.
What do you get when a dinosaur farts?
A blast from the past!
Have you ever seen Helen Keller's dog?
Neither has she.
All of the sudden, if you're Republican, you're racist, and Communism is a symbol of freedom? What happened to the proud men our founding fathers were, damn it!
Yo mama so old, she pre-ordered the Bible.
What do Hiroshima and Nagasaki share in common with balls?
They both drop.
What do you call the Illuminati when they take over the world and control everything?
The Jew World Order.
What’s the difference between Anne Frank and Harry Potter?
Only one came out of the chamber.
Me: 911. You: You died 9/11.
