History

History jokes

The thing about 9/11 and the jokes about it, for most people it flew over their head, for some it flew into their head.

Teacher: Tell me a moral story.

Little Johnny: Once my grandfather was in WW2. He saw everyone praising to kill him. For example, we should sneak up and kill him. We get the helicopter above and shoot him from there. My grandfather heard this, he got his gun and shot them all.

Teacher: What is the moral even?

Little Johnny: Never plan to kill my grandfather.

What do I think about the Kennedy assassination?

First of all, he should have had a roof on that car.

Did you know the Bible has a passage about killing babies by smashing them against rocks?

That's probably because microwaves hadn't been invented yet.

What do Rubik's cubes and melons have in common?

They have a history of separating colors.

The Romans conquered Africa, they conquered Europe, they conquered Britain, then they stopped. They probably ran out of conkers.

My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"