Jesus took bread and said: "This is my flesh!" Then he took wine and said: "This is my blood!" Then he took mayonnaise and Peter said: "Holy shit, now we gotta stop him!"
Why Did Michael Jackson call Boyz 2 Men ? He thought they were a delivery service
I was talking to my welsh friend the other day and he suddenly started talking welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. Turns out he had a stroke
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “what ever you wish for comes true once you slide down”. One kid stepped up and slid down, he wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river. The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money, he then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee”!
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why couldn't the T-Rex clap?
Because he's dead.
have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- he robbed children of their innocence
After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.
Why did the bank robber shoot the man with no arms? Because he told the man to put his hands up
Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.
When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."
How did the cow break up with the other cow? He said he moo-ved on
So 6 is scared of 7 because 7,8,9, but why did 10 have PTSD?
He was stuck in the middle of 9/11
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An older retired couple - the wife had grown tired of her husband farting in bed each night. One morning she put some chicken parts under the blankets in bed next to him and went off to make some coffee, A few minutes later she hears a loud fart followed by a blood curdling scream. He comes out after awhile and says, "Hon, you were right that I would fart my guts out. Took me the longest to put them back in".
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What did the Indian boy say to his mother as he left for school? -- Mumbai!
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when the teacher calls on you and asks you how many people did Hitler kill.
"One, he killed himself"
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