Her jokes
My Mum texted me she had lost her phone.
Yo mama so ugly that Mr. Rogers doesn’t wanna be her neighbor.
I asked what was her favorite type of magic. She said, "the one you make."
What did the mom say when her child came out?
"The head was so big!"
My sister thinks she's sooooo smart. She said that the only food that makes you cry is onions, therefore I threw a coconut at her.
Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.
Yo mama so fat that if we cut her open, we could stop world hunger.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
Ariana Grande was in the store, and when she put her groceries on the counter, she said, "Thank you, next!"
When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.
So, she went to see the "You Should Be Shot" Photography Studio.
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.
Yo mama so stupid, her favorite color is clear.
My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.
Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.
My mom told me that her doctor told her personally that she had to keep herself isolated because she has a few new symptoms that are going around, and those symptoms are that she has big titties, a sweet pussy, and a great ass.
What is the most awkward moment when Helen Keller is playing pin the tail on the donkey?
Her friends aren’t sure whether to blindfold her.
Two whores are watching the sun come up, splitting a bottle of Mad Dog and celebrating another night of servicing the general public. One asks the other: "Say. You ever been picked up by the fuzz?"
Her friend thinks it over, "No...but I have been swung around by the tits a few times!"
The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"
The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"
The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"
The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"
The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"