Her jokes
How do you turn rape into no rape? Steal her bank details for money transfer.
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos tried to snap her out of the world, he couldn't do it, so instead, he clapped her out of the world.
What’s similar between a pregnant 12 year old and the fetus inside of her?
They’re both thinking, “Oh, shit, my mum’s gonna kill me!”
I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"
She replied, "Two or three."
Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.
I'll kill a bitch like the policeman did to that white woman. He chopped her up and put her in the woods, the suck fuck.
this is me
Yo mama so ugly, she had to ask Satan to help her give birth!
How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.
Yo mama so dumb, when a kid told her to “give her a fag,” she kidnapped Ricardo!
Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.
An American goes on a British bus after being in war. He wants to sit down, so he goes to the back of the bus to sit down, but there is an old woman on the seat with her dog in the next one.
The man says, "Will you move your dog?"
The lady says, "Oh, you Americans are always so demanding," and she says to sit somewhere else. He goes through and finds no seats, so now he's at the back again. This time he throws the dog out the window and sits down.
The man in front says, "You Americans always do things wrong. First, you drive on the wrong side of the road, then hold you knife and fork wrong, and you threw the wrong bitch out the window!"
Yo mama so fat that she needs her belly button to beat her home by 15 min.
Yo mama so fat, her swimming is Sea World.
Yo mama so fat, when I swerved to miss her, I ran out of gas.
My mom telling me the brief history of the blanket and how she received it from her cousin. ( ╹▽╹ )
Me sitting anxiously in place pretending to be amazed by the story, and reacting with kind cheerfulness and a big smile. (◍•ᴗ•◍)
All I can actually think about: "I m@sturbated under it- aaaaaah" ಠ◡ಠ
How do you know if your sister's on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes funny.
What's worse than fingering your sister?
Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.
Mary had a great big ram, his fleece was white as snow, when on hands and knees our Mary went, his wad was sure to blow.
Month by month her belly grew, increasing in its girth, and when five months had flown by, our Mary did give birth.
And Mary had a little lamb, a little lamb, a little lamb...
Q: How did Helen Keller break her wrist?
A: Reading road signs.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood type is Ragu.
Yo mama so old,
her memory is black and white.
My Mom said, "I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied."
Well, I said, "Have you seen her?"