Height jokes
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?
Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...
Did you hear about the four foot tall psychic who escaped prison?
He's a small medium at large.
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
Mfs be saying Kobe is good at basketball cause he is 6 feet, ye 6 feet underground.
Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.
What did the minute hand say to the hour hand?
Why are you so tall?
Q: How tall was Hitler's grass? A: *Hitler salute* about this high!
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"
"You raise me up to stand on mountains," said the dwarf pornstar on my penis.
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
You're so short, when you were born, the doctor couldn't tell if you were a boy, a girl, or a Jimmy Dean pork sausage.
What’s the best thing about midgets??
They don’t need to bend while giving blowjobs.
What is the difference between a plane and a helicopter?
A plane hits a building, but a helicopter hits the floor.
Why can't dwarfs be depressed?
Because they are compressed.
I tell short people to reach for the stars.
They are always a bit short of reach.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Short girl: "How do you see up there?"
Tall guy: "Who said that?"
I spit my drink out and then ran away.