Have jokes

Why are orphans so bad at dodge ball?

They don't have a home to run to.

What do emos and apples have in common? They both hang off trees.

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

I don't have a joke. Keep looking.

You have to be a good mom to be a MILF.

What's the difference between an orphan and a pencil?

People actually have a use for one of them.

Roses are red and violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the third one's for you.

Ever have an Italian sausage in a can?

What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?

I don’t have a life.

What are three things the Twin Towers have in common with my dad? They are big, sexy, and smashed your mom.

Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"

Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!

Have you heard of Wendy's?

Yea, Wendy's nuts in you mouth.

What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!

Why did your daddy not come back with the milk?

Because you have no dad because your dad never loved you.

According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"

I was going to make alligator last night, but I noticed I only have a crockpot. 🤣

There's two reasons guys will hang themselves from the neck.

One is to escape the worthless masquerade of a life we pretend we have, and the second reason is to whack off.

I tried having a three-way with two physicists, but they couldn't solve the three-body problem.

What do cake and baseball have in common?

Both need batters.