Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."
Why wasn’t the cheese 🧀 happy?
It was blue 😔.
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human can walk and a tree 🌳 can not walk
What do you call a happy child swinging with her friends at recess?
Not Sally.
Happy new year 🥳
What time do you think 🤔 dogs 🐶 are not happy 😆? Bulldogs
What did one ☝️ cat 🐈 say to the other? Happy 😃
I’m happy to be with my EA when I go to school.
Luigi was dying had two sons Bruno was handsome but Alberto was ugly He said Maria tell me is the is Alberto my son Yes Luigi his wife said and he died happily Wife said thank God he didn’t ask about the other one !!
To whoever stole my antidepressants, I hope you are happy now.
everyone when we're in the cafeteria singing happy birthday to some random person: Happy birthday to you.., Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear____, happy birthday to u Me in the background: Happy deathday to you..., Happy deathday to you, happy death day dear___, happy death day to you!..
My happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my H.I.V. test without studying.
Doctor : what makes you feel depressed? Me: seeing others happy Doctor : ok so what makes you happy? Me: seeing stupid people in misery or agony Doctor: Well that's rather sadistic. Me: well statistically one in two doctors have fingerd a child... Doctor: do you want your prescription or shall I book you an endoscopy? Me: there's nothing hidden inside me, I'm empty "smug face".
Flip 1134 over on a calculator.
Happy holidays.
Person A: C'mon person B, just be happy, smile.
Person B: Over my dead body.
Person B: *gets the noose*
An elderly was happy to finally see his wife again and was packing. He told everyone about the trip. "I will see her in one week" A week later he died
Why Am I Happy? I'm Dead
Hi guys. I am so happy and proud of myself and i thought i should share with you!! Today i saw myself on TV when i turned it off.
Here are some skeleton jokes You know the average person tries to hard and works himself to the bone If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone i can give you a real humerous joke I used to play the trumpet now i play the xylo-bone im always happy nothing gets under my skin I made you some turkey for lunch Bone appetit Im glad i had you im no longer bonely Ive got a skele-ton of more jokes but i'm just giving you one more Did you hear about the skeleton ninja he was very skullful (skillful)
Two guys were walking down the street and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any Blond in the world into giving him a Blowjob, any Blond! So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said alright let's see it! The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, Hi my names Dave and my Doctor just told me that if I didn't get a Blowjob from a Blond within three hours that the disease I have will kill me in 'oh less see now 22 minutes! She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says pull it out! 10 minutes later the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out! So he walks over to her and says I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friends life?! So she looks up him just crying her eyes out even worse and says" I could have saved my dad!"
