
Happening jokes
Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.
So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...
Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall, his mom did a terri-fried call.
He got hurt in a egg-cident, and it never got eggs-elent.
When the eggs-plant was over, he got told to use the mower.
It happened too fast, he watched the very last.
Next he died, eaten all fried.
Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.
There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted to Roblox.
One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury.
One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignored it and continued to play Roblox. Chris's parents came and saw what had happened.
The dad then yelled, "You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!"
Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too."
Don't y'all just hate when something funny to you happens and then you just have to be quiet so you don't look like a villain?
Do nothing about people falling down the stairs, it will keep happening.
Put razor blades on the stairs, it will be their last time falling down the stairs.
Three nuns died in a car crash. They went up to heaven at the pearly gates. The gatekeeper said, "This really should not have happened, so I am going to send you back to earth as different people. Tell me who you want to be or look like." The first nun said, "I want to look like Madonna." Puff, you look like her now, but you can’t use her name. And sent her down to earth. The second one said, "I want to look like Marilyn Monroe." He then makes her look like her and sends her down to earth. The third nun said, "I want to look like Sarah Pipalini." The gatekeeper says to her, "Sarah Pipalini, who is that?" She gives the gatekeeper a newspaper article. He reads it, shakes his head no, and says, "It’s not Sarah Pipalini, it's Sahara pipeline laid by 500 men."
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "What happened?"
What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?
He left him hanging.
Michael Jackson goes to the doctor.
Michael Jackson: "Help, doctor, I've been shot!" Doctor: "I can't fix that, but I can change your skin color so it doesn't happen again."
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
I have a heart, alright. I just happen to see a mere hollow shell of one coming from you.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away!
What happened when the man died? Yes.
What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?
You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!
People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."
Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."
Why is it so punny when Sans tells a joke in the evening?
Because a SANSET is happening.
