Hair jokes

Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.

Yo, barber fucked up so bad he had to get a breathalyzer test.

What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?

Slick her hair, she looks 15.

Joe Mama so weird, she cut her hair in a squiggly diggly haircut.

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

What kind of hair do oceans have? Wavy.

What do emos and guys with a durag have in common? They both have waves, just one is on their arm.

Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."

Can two high-femme lesbians go on a date with each other?

Yes, but it will take them forever to get ready.

What do you call an autistic kid with orange hair?

A boomerang.

One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.

Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"

Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."

Yo, hairline goes farther back than the Big Bang theory!

How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff?

Because they found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment!

There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.

On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."

So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.

Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”

Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?

Head and Shoulders.

Little boy asked his dad why he was born black.

Father replied, "So the heat from the sun doesn't burn your skin."

Then he asks, "Why is our hair all frizzy like fuse wire?"

"So the coconuts when falling from the trees won't hurt you."

"Then what are we doing living in Rochdale? (England)"

Why can't gay people have hairlines? Because it's not straight.

Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣