Hair jokes
So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!
Yo mama's hairline got so many peaks and valleys, you thought you were looking at the Grand Canyon.
Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:
Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂
What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders. 😊
Son: Daddy?
Dad: Why tf do you keep calling me daddy? You're 11 years old, feminine gay hoe.
Son: Whoa!? Daddy, what's that?
Dad: Wtf are you talking about?
Son: Your dick has gotten more tastier?
Son: Ooh... I..... Just.... Wanna.... Sssuuc
Dad: Oh nope, I'm not having a gay hoe's fiend in my house, no quit looking at my dick, you need some pussy.
Son: eeeeeewwwwwwwwwww nooooo plz no plz
Dad: Shut the fuck up: ehr em
Mom: What the fugde is going on?
Dad: Our son's a gay bitch.
Mom: Language! So? I need to teach him how to like a girl huh?
Dad: Yes Ma'am, plz.
Mom: Okay. Herman, get your gay ass in my bed but naked, I'll be there in 10.
Son: wha whey huh ur gonna... wtf?!?!?!??
Mom: Quit cursing, I'm gonna fuck u extra hard!!
Son: Ewww, I'm gonna fuck my mom even though she is hot sexy but eeewwww.
Mom: Shut it!!!, or I'm gonna recordid and *fliped her hair taking off her panies (pussy naked)* and show this to ur gay fuck friends!
Son: Huh
Son: Mom FUCK U*
Mom: Okay baby I'm gonna fuck u in a minute lemme tak my bra off
Son: UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH
Son: Moms are the worst, are they?
Me no there not sometimes but i love them teheheteheh
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
How does a prostitute that has blond hair and polish and a gay white male kill erectile dysfunction for his clients?
He performs fellatio on them.
You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.
An emo girl dyed her hair red.
Where does her hairline start? Her wrist.
So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...
Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.
I met Lebron James, and he was so bald at the time that I could count his hairs.
And that's 1 hair and maybe 2.
Give a blind kid a gun and tell him it's a hair dryer.
Your hair is so far back, you left it at your last address.
What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?
They both try to get there before the hair does.
I love your hair today.
How did you get it to come out your nose like that?
Your hair goes so far back in time, even cavemen saw it!
How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?
Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.
Is your hairline a time traveler, because it went way back?
Yo Momma so hairy, she has to shampoo her armpits.
Yo hair so big it took me weeks to find the needle in it.