Hair

Hair jokes

Indian

There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"

The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."

The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”

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  • Hairline

    Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

    Cut

    I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."

    Theme Song

    Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!

    Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:

    Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂

    Memes

    Wave

    What do emos and guys with a durag have in common? They both have waves, just one is on their arm.

    Barber

    Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.

    Roblox

    One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.

    Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"

    Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."

    Dandruff

    How did they know Princess Diana had dandruff?

    Because they found her Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment!

    Hairline

    There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.

    On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."

    So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.

    Boy

    Little boy asked his dad why he was born black.

    Father replied, "So the heat from the sun doesn't burn your skin."

    Then he asks, "Why is our hair all frizzy like fuse wire?"

    "So the coconuts when falling from the trees won't hurt you."

    "Then what are we doing living in Rochdale? (England)"

    Priest

    Man: I must confess, Father.

    Priest: What are you here to confess?

    Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.

    Priest: And what happened to your son?

    Man: He said a man raped him.

    Priest: When and where did this happen?

    Man: A local church. I don't know which one.

    Priest: ...By whom?

    Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.

    Priest: ...Shit

    Assumption

    Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”

    Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”