Hair Jokes

What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?

A "glad-he-ate-her".

What kind of chair inhabits your soul?

A hair!

I was at school with friends. One of my friends had hair in her armpits. The rest of my friends and I tried not to laugh or say anything, until one of my friends laughed and told her she had hair in her armpits, so she ran to her locker to get hair remover and went to one of the restroom stalls.

Yo mama so hairy that when she go to the hair salon they say, "No pets allowed."

Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.

Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.

One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"

The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."

After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."

The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"

After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.

The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."

The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."

The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."

The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."

The first kid then says: "I know, right?"

They then begin a snowball fight.

The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"

Big Dolly Parton hair, like an 80s prom queen!

When is it acceptable to hit a dwarf?

When he dances with your wife and says her hair smells nice...

Your hairline's so far back even Rosa Parks refused to sit there.

What's the difference between Donald Trump and Derek Vinyard?

A shaved head, a chest tattoo, and a moustache.

Like it if you judge people's hairlines.

What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards?

A receding hare line.

How do emos compliment each other?

They say, "I like your cuts g."

If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?

When Bob the Builder looks at your hairline, he says, "We can't fix that."

I conducted a survey. I asked 100 women what kind of shampoo they used while they were in the shower? 98 of them said, "How the fuck did you get in here?" 😂😂😂

What's the best haircut?

Chemotherapy.

I have the heart of my mom, the face of my dad, the eyes of my grandpa, the ears of my grandma, and the hair of my uncle. We don't look anything alike; I just collect body parts.

What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer?

You can’t pull on her hair when you’re raping her.

Me and my friend were roasting each other. She said, "You look like a Reese's cup." I replied, "You're so old, your pubic hairs are 50 shades of gray."