Guy jokes
Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?
A: Ow!
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
"I work with animals," a guy says to his date.
"That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?"
"I'm a butcher," he replies.
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.
Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏
Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Memes
Your hairline retreats from your face just like all the guys that look at you.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
We shouldn't call gay guys "fucking cunts" because they aren't fucking cunts, they're fucking assholes.
Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.
The boys joking be like:
One guy: "Balls!"
All the other guys: "Hahahahaha!"
I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.
Quote Of The Day: Where there is no struggle, there is no strength.
Love you guys, and hope today was amazing!
Peace out! <3
You know who deserves a medal? The guy who killed Hitler.
A guy told me, "Nothing rhymes with orange."
So I replied, "No, it doesn't."
What do you call Joe from Family Guy in an electric wheelchair?
RoboCop.
An emo kid and a silent kid would be a good acquaintance because the emo would wish to die, and the silent kid would be the nice guy and grant that wish.
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
Guys, what do you call an un-aborted and parentless child?...
An orphan.
How can a guy do stand up comedy in a wheelchair?