Guy

Guy Jokes

Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?

Friend 2: Yup.

Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?

Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

Guy: "My life is like a game, I should end it."

Guy 2: "Is it a hard life?"

Guy: "Yup"

Guy 2: "Then you can't kill yourself LOL"

Guy 3: "Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the 'game'"

Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.

He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.

We will miss ya bud..... (cyndagoooooooo)

A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid.

Man: "Hang in there! I'm gonna get some help!"

Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said.

RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)

Daniel committed suicide five years ago today......

There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbbells tables, but he wasn't lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up.

The manager then walked over to him and asked, "You're hogging the dumbbells, dude! What are you even doing?" The boy hesitated, then said, "Getting ripped, wanna join me?" as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. "Why not?" he finally said.

What is the difference between shroud and a shroud imposter?

Shroud uses reddit, and the imposter uses WJE.

Reddit king and q, I really dgaf what you say, you guys are practically obsessed with me cuz ur leaving hate comments on almost all my jokes, so stop. You're obviously gonna look bad if you just insult meh jokes.

If you guys dont like my jokes, you can just dislike and not leave a comment, ok?

A depressed guy walks into a utensil store and finds a knife, but he didn't stab himself... Part 2 coming out tomorrow.

So I came across a guy who was carrying a ton of clothing and makeup.

And I asked him what he is doing.

Guy: Some kawaii girl told me if I bought and brought her this crap, she would let me play with her tits.

Me: Erm... Are you a simp?

Two minutes later, the guy arrived at Kawaii Girl's house.

KG: You have it?

Guy: Yup, now can I play with them?

KG: Sure!

KG then went to her room.

Guy: Ohhhh, I know what your going to do. You're gonna call me over and you will be-

KG then held a bird cage with two birds in it.

KG: Have fun playing with them!

Guy: WHAT THE FU-

J0K35 (me): So I heard China recently released a snack.

Guy: Oh, what is it?

J0K35: They call it the Asian Raisin.

Guy: Isn't that what RiceGum was when he released Frick da police?

So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm๐Ÿค”.. it's like ๐Ÿค”๐Ÿค”...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‰

Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"

4

Two guys are captured by native Chinese. They give them two choices: 1. Death. 2. ไป–ๅฆˆ็š„

The first guy: What's ไป–ๅฆˆ็š„?

The Chinese: Fucking.

The first guy chooses death.

Second guy to himself: Well, I'll let these sick fucks fuck me. At least I'll be alive...

The Chinese: Come on, we don't have all day.

Second guy: I choose ไป–ๅฆˆ็š„.

The Chinese: Ok, ไป–ๅฆˆ็š„ to the death!

I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.

It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.

Did you know if you give a guy a plane ticket, he flies once, but if you push him out of a plane, he flies for the rest of his life.