Guess

Guess jokes

Girl

  • So I was eating this girl out the other day, and I GOT AIDS. How does a 9-year-old give me AIDS? I guess my sister was hanging around the wrong crowd.

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  • Revolution

  • Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.

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  • Name

  • I went to an interview and my future boss said, "Hi, my name is Watt Niseto, meet you."

    Then said, "WHAT IS UR NAME?" He then said,

    "What is not my name, Watt is." So I replied, "Ugh fine, I guess I'll call you Wha." Then he said, "Wha I not my name."

    And then I said, "Ugh fine, my name is Will Knott." He then replied, "Hi Will Not."

    Asian

  • I called an Asian person and asked, 'Is this Mister Wing?' 'No.'

    I called once more and asked, 'Is this Mister Wong?' 'No.'

    I guess I 'winged the Wong number.'

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  • Anxiety

  • Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.

    Blowjob

  • I went home one day, and three guys—a Spanish guy, a Chinese guy, and a white guy—told me, "You should be proud of your sister. She won a trophy about knowing her flavor of meats." Then my sister told me that I was blindfolded, and she gave all of them a blowjob, and I had to guess which flavor that I was sucking on. I was right all the time, and they gave me a trophy. The Trophy says "Blowjobs of the Flavors." As a brother, I couldn't be prouder.

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  • Desk

  • My friend said, "Dude, if you don't put your desk in line with the column, you're gay." So he did it, and I said, "Well, I guess now he's straight." ;D

    Uniform

  • I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀

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  • Fart

  • So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the roll, and then I said, "I guess that's why it's called ripping one!"

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  • Bet

  • So, Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says, "Teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "Okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But before class ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the students clear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well, come with me out to my dad's car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car, she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day!"

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  • Soda

  • I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it is just a FANTAsea.

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  • Lol

  • Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

    Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

    Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

    Stacy: lol

    Cell

  • My science teacher asked me what is found inside cells.

    I guess "blacks" wasn't the right answer.

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  • School

  • My friend had no school because of heavy snow. Guess you could say it was a snow school day!

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