Guess

Guess jokes

Uniform

    • I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀

    Spanish

    • Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."

    Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.

    Anxiety

    • Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.

    Chess

    • In British chess I guess they play without a queen...

    But in American chess they play without 2 towers.

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    • Wife

    • Tony's wife got a divorce from Tony. She said she wanted to be an independent woman.

    Days later, Tony's wife had an accident. Guess who's crawling back for help. 💀

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    • Paul Walker

    • When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.

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    • Death

    • When I die I want to have a piece of paper near me giving a clue on how I died, like, "I want everyone to miss me except for this bullet," or, "You didn't hang with me but guess what did?"

    Accident

    • Today I found out that my cat got hit by a car accident. Well, I guess I'm gonna play ninja fruits on my hands again. It's not like anyone will notice.

    Wheelchair

    • My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

    9/11

    • The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.

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    • ID

    • When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?

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