What is an orphan's most hated baseball team? The Padres.
What is a thing orphans have that we can never have?
Imaginary parents.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
Your mom! Oh wait, you don't have one.
Wanna know something the orphan could never do?
Wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.
"I’m sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing.
Except at a funeral.
How do you punch 40 kids in the face at once? Hit them with a “Sandy Hook”.
So an orphan was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Then said, "Do you want me to get your parents?"
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."
Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."
Orphan: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
What do you call an orphan family? None existent.
You were sad because your grandmother died.
The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.
It's horrible to make jokes about 9/11, but it's not funny when I found out my mate's mum jumped from the 21st floor.
My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
