Grief jokes
Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.
Orphan: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad never came home with the milk.
*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."
Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."
A 10 year old girl meets with her doctor. The doctor tells her “Katie, I’m sorry to have to tell you that your parents didn’t survive the accident. Sadly, our tests also show that you have early onset Alzheimer’s disease.”
Katie replies “well at least my parents will look after me.”
Why can’t an orphan play baseball??
They can’t hit a home run! 😂
Why do orphans hate mitosis cells?
They have parents.
Say this when you answer a spam call...
"Hi, welcome to Bob's Taco Shack and Funeral Home, where yesterday's grief is today's beef."
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
You were sad because your grandmother died.
The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make them clap until their parents come back.
What do you call it when an orphan goes to Panera Bread?
"Panera, my parents are dead."
What should you never say to an orphan?
"Your Mom."
What's cold, blue and makes women cry?
Cot death.
What’s the difference between a dog and parents?
If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.
How's your dad?
What? I forgot he's still sleeping.
I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.
Why is an orphan crying about its family?
Because it can't "let it go."
Orphans: Where are my parents?
Random person: In the bed.
I asked the orphan kid if his mom is hot. He just started crying.