Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him bitches always come and go. He’ll looked to me kinda mad kinda confused and said that’s my mom dude
When your baby is stillborn and you have a funeral, what song should you never play?
Alphaville - "Forever Young."
Miscarriage jokes aren't funny, just cut it out.
Imagine saying "my bad" instead of "sorry for your loss" at a funeral.
Damn Really stole my friend glasses well now their blind but not really their dead.
When you find out your wife had a miscarriage,
So you start singing "It’s the best day ever!"
My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.
It's horrible to make jokes about 9/11, but it's not funny when I found out my mate's mum jumped from the 21st floor.
Q: Why did the orphan cross the road?
A: To get to the other side to find his parents.
There was no other side of the road.
What's the worst thing to say at a funeral? "Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
Me: I saw your parents yesterday.
Orphan girl: Where?
Me: The coffin was still open.
The cemetery is so crowded, people are just dying to get in.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. It just made her more upset. She screamed at me and said, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"
I cried when my dad cut up onions. Onions was a good dog.
What do you call an orphan family? None existent.
